


Three To Tango

by biichan



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Episode Related, Multi, Threesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-07-18
Updated: 2009-07-18
Packaged: 2017-10-05 00:43:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/35874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/biichan/pseuds/biichan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The true story of what happened on the way back to Paris. (Probably.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Three To Tango

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place during the final episode of _City of Death_.
> 
> (Thanks to LizBee for looking this over for me.)

"So do you live here, in this box of yours?" Duggan asked, peering around the roundish room with its white walls. There were circle things on the walls. He couldn't remember at first what they were called.

"Oh yes," said Romana, smiling at him. The Doctor didn't smile, but he'd stuck his head under the mushroom-shaped thing in the center and was doing something with tools.

He looked around the room. There wasn't a bed. "But where do you _sleep_?"

"I don't need to, much," said Romana. "A few hours every few nights, that's all. I do have a room with a bed in it, though. Would you like to see it?"

"Sure," Duggan said casually. "Why not?"

Her room was some few dozen doors down a corridor that seemed to stretch on endlessly. Dugan had expected something pretty marvelous, but it was all quite simple and understated. There were more of those circle things on the walls. They seemed to be everywhere in the Time Machine.

"I'm told at this point I should ask you if you would like to see my etchings," Romana said quite seriously. "Unfortunately, I don't seem to have any."

"I noticed," said Duggan.

Romana smiled. "Yes, well. That being said, would you like to have sexual relations with me? The Doctor tells me that our two species are remarkably sexually compatible."

"Prior experience, eh?" Duggan said sagely, as Romana handed him her straw hat. He placed it on the side table.

"Yes, quite at lot of it, if the stories he tells are true. I've been looking forward to having an assistant of my own to engage in sexual relations with for quite some time."

"Do you want me to help you out of that?" Duggan offered.

"Oh no," said Romana. "I'm doing quite all right on my own. Besides, you need to take off your own clothes."

"Right," said Duggan and he proceeded to do so—a bit awkwardly, because he didn't want to take his eyes off Romana. He'd have thought she'd have worn frilly underthings underneath the school uniform, but it turned out she'd worn nothing underneath at all.

Her tits were firm and rosy-nippled, if a bit smaller than the usual girls in his magazines, but they went well with her slim, willowy figure. He took them in his hand, brushed the nipples with his thumb, and heard her sigh. He kissed the side of her neck and was rewarded with a delighted moan, then sucked at the skin he'd kissed until Romana whimpered and rubbed herself against him.

Her tiny hand wrapped itself around his cock, feeling around the length of it before letting go. Romana laughed delightedly. "Oh _good_. I was slightly afraid the anatomical compatibility wouldn't work the other way around." She pushed him gently onto her bed, then climbed on top of him.

Duggan bit his lip and tried not to moan as she lowered herself onto him. She was warm and wet and tight around his cock—and yet, there was something distinctly different between the feel of her and the feel of the sort of woman he usually did this with: barmaids, working girls, the occasional posh would-be divorcée who'd wanted to reward him for an investigative job well-done. Something... well, something not quite human.

"Mmmm," said Romana. "Nice."

"You feel strange," said Duggan, awkwardly.

Romana frowned. "You don't like it?" She shifted slightly forward. Duggan whimpered.

"Oh, he likes it," said a jolly-sounding voice from the doorway. "Trust me, I've seen enough young men in this position to know what one looks like when he's thoroughly enjoying himself. I believe our friend was merely remarking that despite the compatibilities in your respective anatomies, they are still those of two very different species."

Duggan tried to push himself up, but Romana had him too well pinned. "You didn't say he was going to be joining us," he said peevishly.

"I didn't think he would be for quite some time," Romana confessed. "You don't mind if he's here, do you?"

Duggan blinked furiously. "Mind? _Mind_?"

The Doctor laughed. "My dear Romana, just go back to fucking him sideways. You won't get anything sensible out of him until he's at least nominally post-coital."

"Right," said Romana and she started rocking against Duggan, kissing his neck and nibbling on his earlobes. "You really are a very lovely human, you know," she whispered against the corner his mouth.

Duggan didn't reply. His own mouth was entirely too busy making other noises to form actual words. Her bare tits were brushing against his chest and the rosy nipples were quite hard. He found himself thrusting back into her, any qualms about their audience quite forgotten. He didn't even notice the Doctor sitting down on the bed next to him until he felt the hot breath in his ear.

The Doctor's voice was low and laughing: "You really ought to watch what you say, you know. If I hadn't been there to reassure Romana, things could have ended very badly. I suggest you pay special attention to her neck to make up for that: it's an erogenous zone for our species. Incidentally, the reason why she might feel 'strange' to you probably has to do with the fact that her equivalent of the human clitoris is not only located on the vaginal wall but is both much longer and much narrower."

Romana ground down hard against him. Duggan groaned. Out of the corner of his eye he could see the Doctor stroking himself through his trousers.

"Male members of our species have something of a shallow indentation running down the anterior length of our penii," the Doctor continued, "which is quite sensitive. It's not all that noticeable, though, and an ignorant human would probably attribute it to scarring. You'll have a chance to see that for yourself quite soon, however, as I have every intention of buggering you senseless when Romana is finished. Unless, of course, you'd rather have her do the buggering?"

That, that did it. Duggan came _hard_, with a resounding yell, and slumped back down on the bed, the Doctor and Romana's laughter ringing in his ears.

"He looks tired," said Romana curiously, as she slid herself off him.

"Well," said the Doctor. "He's only human." He stroked Duggan's cheek. "And he's done a great deal of running today. Oh, and punching too, of course."

Romana laughed. "Of course." She cocked her head to the side. "What in the world were you whispering to him? It seems to have been rather effective."

"Oh, just an anatomy lecture," the Doctor said airily. "He does seem to have liked it, doesn't he?"

Duggan snorted. "I'm right here, you know."

"We've noticed," said the Doctor.

"Well," said Duggan. "You don't have to talk about me like I'm not even there." He glared a bit, but the expression was ruined by his need to yawn widely.

Romana sighed. "You need to sleep, don't you?"

"Maybe," said Duggan. He yawned again.

Romana sighed again and shook her head. "I suppose the Doctor and I can keep ourselves occupied while you rest. Perhaps I'll even be able to convince him that you're _my_ assistant."

"Ours," said the Doctor. "This is a TARDIS which shares."

"Don't listen to him," said Romana.

Duggan yawned. "Won't."

"Good," Romana said, smiling. "You don't mind if we take the long way back to Paris, do you?"

"Not." Yawn. "One." Yawn. "Bit."

And if Romana or the Doctor said anything else after that, Duggan didn't hear them because he was fast asleep.

* * *

By the time they got back to Paris in 1979, Duggan had managed to punch out an intergalactic art thief, half-a-dozen interstellar con-artist, an entire ship full of space pirates, three Daleks, five Cybermen, eight cat nuns, ten Autons, Jack the Ripper, Bertie Wooster and, in a very confusing series of events, himself.

(That wasn't even mentioning the giant alien frog who divided his time between being a captain of industry and a criminal mastermind. But that was business and anyway, he'd had help from a penguin.)

He'd also had some of the best sex in his life. But as his two lovers had both unlimited stamina and little or no reason to sleep, leaving had been inevitable. Duggan had no intention of dying from exhaustion, no matter how much fun it would be on the way.

Still, he thought, as he slipped the postcard into his trench coat pocket and watched the Doctor and Romana wave to him from the foot of the Eiffel Tower, at least they'd always have Paris.


End file.
